At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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