so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
