Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
