I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
