Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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