and you said cock pushups were impossible
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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