So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
