we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Randomize
