I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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