i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
