I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
