i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
