Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
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