Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Randomize
