I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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