you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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