Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
