I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
