So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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