My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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