Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
