My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Ladies don't puke and tell
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
