Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
