just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
