dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
