Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
