Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
