I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
