Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
someone owes me an orgasm
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just invented taco cereal.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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