so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize
