i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
