Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
