garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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