she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
