why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
