im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
