Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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