You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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