Your tits are I can't wait for
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize