In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
do nipples grow back?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
