This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
