my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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