right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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