So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
