you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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