ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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