the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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