she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
