You really coming over, don't trick.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
