She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
